Dakim Blog

August 5, 2011

Like Mary Freakin’ Tyler Moore!

Written by: Sarah Hersack

Just one more thing about that “feeling pretty” business…

When I was just starting out in the working world, one of my paychecks, probably in its entirety, went to buying myself a new leather coat—my first. And, as new clothing is known to do for girls in their 20s, it indeed put a fresh bounce in my step as I headed off for work.

I had built an entire “outfit” (or, as my brother used to call each of my ensembles: a “costume”) from head to toe that played off this hip-length, caramel-colored, creamy smooth, fabulous-fitting jacket di tutti jackets. Yes, I was feeling fine and inviting any and all admiration as I stood there waiting for my bus.

Now, I lived in the Northwest at the time, and as any self-respecting Seattleite knows, you do not even go out on the porch in a jacket such as mine without first Scotchgarding it to within an inch of its life. And that was the case on this particular morning, so when I felt a little rain, I thought nothing of it, and it did nothing to dampen my feeling of elation. I was in the right mood to notice people were noticing me,…and they were,…and I was loving it!

In my jubilation (do you remember how a new piece of clothing could make you feel that good!?), when I got to work I swung in through the doors like Mary freakin’ Tyler Moore! I immediately began, like a heat-seeking missile, to hunt down the guy that I currently had a crush on. As I hurried along, in all my glory, I paused only once, to glance at my image in a mirror that I passed. I fully expected confirmation of a perfect picture.

What I saw, however, stopped me cold.

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August 2, 2011

A Last Chance to Feel Pretty? Hogwash!

Written by: Sarah Hersack

It’s true, I confess, I own a TV that, yes, I actually watch (probably enough to be at the high end of the national average). Because of that, I have definitions of “pretty” and “handsome” being pushed at me all the time. I also buy fashion magazines knowing that I do not look like the women in the ads. I also know that all of this is targeted to a very narrow segment of the population–of which I am not a member—but I still enjoy looking at the clothes and seeing what’s being advertised.

I’m also a fan of self-improvement. Living healthier, more fully, smarter—making body and brain fitness a priority. Each offers a return on investment and is, as they say, “great at any age.”

That’s why, when I saw Carrie Fisher’s recent television ad for her participation in a popular diet plan, I was excited to see a woman I admire being that kind of role model for millions of other women. She’s lost 30+ pounds, which is fabulous—it can only lead to better health and higher self-esteem.

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June 29, 2011

To Be—or NOT To Be—”of a Certain Age”

Written by: Sarah Hersack

When I was a child, my father would often refer to a lady as being a “woman of a certain age” when talking to my mother about a female client or acquaintance within his grown-up world of existence. I remembered the phrase because he would use it with an amount of humor, as though the woman he was referring to was still interesting and energetic, even if she was “older.”

“Une femme d’un certain âge” was originally coined in France and reserved for reference to a late-middle-aged woman. For a great discussion of the phrase’s origin and meaning, see William Safire’s wonderful essay from the New York Times.

Today, the idea of “a certain age” is applied to both men and women. And while I like it—I also don’t like it. For all its elegance, it’s still a stereotype. The phrase seeks to create a definable stage of life without offending. So, if I’m “a certain age,” I guess it means I’m in “aging limbo” —a sanctuary (or sanitarium, perhaps?) where I can still be delightfully “colorful”—nay, even “wonderfully eccentric”—without the head-shaking that would ensue if I were truly “OLD”!

Indeed, being labeled as “of a certain age” would appear to be a reprieve from the harsh judgments directed at the “elderly.” At this, I’m expected to dance youthfully around, raising the roof, saying, “Woohoo! I’m not old, I’m just ‘a certain age’!”

Well, you know what? I’m not buying it.

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